Breaking News…Barbie’s been a VERY bad girl and…

Square

…Ken leaves her over the scandal!

Video of Ken’s shocked reaction when he learns the terrible news is below.

On a side note I must admit I’ve never been a Barbie fan. In fact…[Warning: real-life shocking fact about me ahead—>]…I’ve never owned a Barbie doll.

I know, I know. This information sends most people reeling. If you need a moment to recover from the news I totally understand.

But, you see, even as a young girl I always thought Barbie was a useless, somewhat deformed, airhead who needed to get a real job. All those clothes and possessions she surrounded herself with were clearly an attempt to cover up some serious personality issues. What we have there is a case of borderline personality disorder at the very least and possibly much, much worse.

So, frankly, I have to admit that this latest Barbie scandal really comes as no surprise to me.

When the other girls were oohing and ahhing over their latest Barbie accessories I always preferred my purple dune buggy car and, of course, my set of hippie Sunshine Family dolls.

Wait…what? You don’t know who The Sunshine Family was?! You’re kidding me right? Didn’t everyone….or their sister… have these dolls?

Hm… looks like my slightly bohemian slightly hippie upbringing strikes again.

Well, here’s a nice little description that sums up the Sunshine’s in all of their bare foot, prairie dress sporting, beard wearing, glory…

This sweet little doll family, made in the 70’s, celebrates some of the values of the 60’s and 70’s – family unity, simple living, artistic creativity, “right livelihood”, love of nature, back-to-the-land, “do it yourself”, neighborliness. The dolls came with booklets showing the child owner how to make items for their dolls themselves – balancing consumerism with creativity, improvisation, and participation.

Now, I must warn you before you press play that you should mentally prepare yourself for the possibility that you too may wish that you had made acquaintances with the Sunshine’s rather than adorable-little-forest-animal hating Barbie…